This family counted their blessings!

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I was fascinated as I read how this family made it through, or simply, pulling it through, the hard times in their life, even as the husband lost his job and had to stay home as what they call 'househusband' - a complete and opposite expectation from the local communities family structure, where the man works and the wife stays at home as the 'housewife.'

No, that isn't even the message that I wanted to point out here.

My point to make is that it doesn't matter anymore what others are saying, what your neighbours (especially if they can't help you) may think and say about the 'changes' that you apply in your family structure is irrelevant, so you can continue with your life - through the hard times.

Besides, there is nothing wrong with the adjustment you make.

Perhaps, it is time to 'open up' the mind, instead of the mouth.

I say, they are still a respectable family, in that the husband and wife will do even the 'unusual' to raise their family - and still keep being respectable.

Read on.....

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Adapting as a househusband

Letter from Zhang Lianguo

I REFER to "Count your blessings" (April 23) and would like to share my story as a househusband.

Similar to Budget Tai Tai's friend, Househusband (myself) was told by his boss that his services were no longer required by the company on an otherwise normal day in 2008.

All he received for his immediate release was two months' pay in lieu of notice.

After going through the "anger-denial-acceptance-frustration-calm-down" psychological process, Househusband decided to move on and start again despite being in his mid-40s.

Times are hard. It is tough for a middle-aged man to get back on the professional track.

Househusband cast his net wide to secure a job. However, he saw all his applications come to nothing.

As with many unsuccessful cases, he was categorised as either over-qualified or not experienced enough.

At a walk-in interview, he was told politely: "Sir, I am afraid this is a mis-match for the job which you are applying for."

Looking around the function hall teeming with young job-seekers with black hair prevailing over those with grey hair, Househusband left without questioning the rationale of the statement.

If not for a "Corporate Wife", Househusband would have probably been a taxi driver now. After weighing all factors, Househusband opted to be a househusband. (Actually there weren't many options left.)

Mine is a typical Singaporean family: Husband and wife were full time employees. The children attended school, while a foreign domestic helper (FDH) attended to the household chores.

With household reduced to a single income, the priority was to tighten daily expenses.

With a full time Househusband installed, the post of FDH seemed to be redundant. When the incumbent FDH left for home after her work permit expired, another was not hired.

My situation was a challenge to the family, as it totally "derailed" the traditions of the society we live in.

Well, as change becomes the norm in today's life, adapting is the way to go.

You might have noticed that even the taxman had rephrased the phrase "Dependent Wife" to "Dependent Spouse".

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Taken from TODAY, Voices - Tuesday, 27-April-2010
Adapting as a househusband
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